Tuesday, 7 April 2015

F = Formal Speech




Formal Speech is one aspect of Formal Protocol. And Protocol, formal protocol, is a rigorous series of structured behaviours that are used to focus attention and direct actions in a specific manner. The Dominant wants the submissive to act in a certain way and he or she wants the attention of the submissive totally and undivided on the task at hand. Because every D/s relationship is different and we cannot read minds, the Dominant will want to train his submissive in Protocol. That includes Position training (later in the A-Z) guess what letter, and Voice and Speech training as well.

Voice training is the tone of speech, the way we talk, loud or quiet, and some people have rules there should not be laughter in the voice. I disagree with that. In D/s can be a very respectful conversation with a playful undertone. Submission should bring joy and joy should be expressed. A clear example there are no rules written in stone in this community.

Speech training is about when to speak and how to speak. I will tell something about my "formal speech rules". I always tell my submissive "we are under formal speech rules from now" and in formal speech rules:
  • the submissive does not speak until she or he is spoken to, unless there is a physical reason to do so (I'm very thirsty Master, can have a glass of water, My legs hurt, Master, may I stand up now);
  • the submissive answers each question respectfully and ends each sentence with Sir, or Master;
  • the submissive gives short answers, to the point and does not elaborate.
Some people have twenty or more rules about talking, but I think less = more. Some people require that the submissive talks about herself in the third person:  With permission, may this creature/slave/girl get itself a drink, Sir? I don't like that either. My submissive is not my property, she chooses to be submissive to me of her own free will. Nobody is forcing her to do so. And for such a brave act she should be proud of her own submission. She is not this creature, this slave or this girl. When she's mine I'm proud of her.












12 comments:

  1. Interesting thoughts on the use of the third person (or not). Where did you get the illustration from? Is it your work?

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    1. Thank you for your comment NM. The illustrations are wonderful are they not? I have found them on several places on the Internet and they are made by a French artist I'm planning a post about right after the A-Z challenge is over...

      Thank you again for your comment,
      Han

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  2. I love coming to visit and learning more information from you Han. The only formal speech requirement I had was having to use 'Sir' as in 'Yes, Sir', 'No, Sir', 'Sorry, Sir' if Matthew disciplined me. Thanks for sharing.

    Hugs and blessings...
    Cat

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    1. Yes, most books don't cover anything more then Yes, Sir, No, Sir, Fuck yourself, Sir, either. But D/s is all about rituals at least in my book..

      Thank you for your comment Cat, I appreciate it,
      Han

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  3. Ok, then I have learned something new again..
    Take care,
    Mona Lisa

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    1. I'm glad you found it interesting, Mona Lisa. You know what they say about a day nothing learned... No?

      I don't either, but I love it when you comment my post,
      Han

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  4. When you are through this A-Z, I think I have a 'complete' guide for bdsm, Han. Interesting. Thanks.

    appy

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    1. LOL, a complete guide according to a guy called Han van Meegeren, Appy. It is my interpretation and just as good as any other.

      I'm glad you find it interesting,
      Han

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  5. The last paragraph gives me new understanding and respect for you and your submissive.

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    1. Thank you for your lovely compliment Leigh. Wanita and I appreciate that.

      I'm so curious about your corner 'experiment',
      Han

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  6. I am really enjoying your series. There are times when "formal speech" is required, especially in a scene or around other Doms. But in general, most of the people I know are free to joke around, laugh, and speak as they wish (as long as they are respectful to the Dom).

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    1. I agree Blonde, respectful can be in a playful way. Celebrate life! Formal speech is good at times, it does have a function, but at most times it is the interaction that makes this play so exciting...

      Thank you for enjoying my Infinitesimal thoughts,
      Han

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