Monday, 30 June 2014

Z = Zoning out

Vanilla Post

Finally I have reached the Z. Zoning out, I don't know if its is proper English, but it is the last of my share of the Spanking A-Z blogs. 13 "Naughty Posts" (some not so naughty) and 13 "Vanilla Posts" (some not so vanilla).The closure of another challenge,  a closure in more ways than one. It didn't end the way I ever imagined the way it would. Nonetheless a sad month though.

I think it is appropriate to zone out with the most melancholic song I know:

Send in the Clowns

Isn't it rich, are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clowns.

Isn't it bliss, don't you approve?
One who keeps tearing around,
One who can't move
Where are the clowns?
Send in the clowns.

Just when I'd stopped opening doors,
Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours.
Making my entrance again with my usual flair,
Sure of my lines;
No one is there.

Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear,
I thought that you'd want what I want,
Sorry my dear
But where are the clowns
There ought to be clowns
Quick send in the clowns

What a surprise!
Who could foresee
I'd come to feel about you
What you felt about me?
Why only now when I see
That you've drifted away?
What a surprise...
What a cliche'...

Isn't it rich, isn't it queer
Losing my timing this late in my career
And where are the clowns
Quick send in the clowns
Don't bother, they're here.

Performer: Barbra Streisand
Song: Stephen Sondheim

Sunday, 29 June 2014

Y = Don't Yuck my Yum

Naughty Post

I really like the saying "Don't yuck my yum".  It basically means “Don’t tell me that what I like is gross just because you don’t like it.” If you don't like hair bondage (see hair post - you fill in your own yum) and you decide to tell me, you are yucking my yum. The other way around is also true. If I keep talking about my yum and you are quite repulsed by the idea, it's making you uncomfortable  is just as bad. We may not all be into the same sorts of things, but we should still all respect each other and each other’s diversities.

Yucking another (wo)man's yum is something that happens in the BDSM community as much as in the Vanilla one, I think. We are more tolerant to each other's kink as long as we think it is safe, sane and consensual. But it's doesn't make you enlightened towards sexual assault, homophobia, racism and sexism for instance.

Still there is a lot of online support if something happens that yucks someone's yum. And that is great. Because if we don't body shame or kink shame other peoples yum. You might not be into the same as what they’re into, but that's okay.  Try to be aware of if you are making other people uncomfortable. If you are talking about a topic just to make other people uncomfortable, take a step back and consider your choices.

Don’t yuck someone’s yum, and don’t yum their yuck.

Saturday, 28 June 2014

Scorching heat or dryness: Ramadan

From today until July, 27th

Today the month of fasting of the Muslim people has started. Muslims worldwide, with Ramadan and the devotion to fasting, are able to feel more sympathy and connection to the poor and the oppressed by feeling themselves the pain of hunger and lessen human activity that consequently lessens the human potential. Muslims also reflect on the acts of becoming more generous to the needy and the hungry upon the event of allowing themselves to experience hunger themselves.

While fasting from dawn until sunset, Muslims refrain from consuming food, drinking liquids, smoking, and engaging in sexual relations; in some interpretations they also refrain from swearing. Food and drink is served daily, before sunrise and after sunset. According to Islam, the thawab (rewards) of fasting are many, but in this month they are believed to be multiplied. Fasting for Muslims during Ramadan typically includes the increased offering of salat (prayers) and recitation of the Quran.

Fasting does not apply only to the human urge to eat. This also covers the abstinence from evil thoughts, words and actions. For instance, a person must avoid from allowing his/her mind to travel so relentlessly, especially to malicious thoughts. A person must not use his/her tongue to talk too much for this exercises the tongue. In the same light, a person must not allow his/her body from doing excessive activities. Thus, the means of fasting for Ramadan goes beyond hunger. It is the involvement of the whole human body: an oath to cleanse and purify the soul for divine salvation.

Suhoor and Iftar

Each day before dawn, many Muslims observe a pre-fast meal called suhoor. After stopping a short time before dawn, Muslims begin the first prayer of the day, Fajr.

In the evening, dates are usually the first food to break the fast; according to tradition, Muhammad broke fast with three dates. Following that, Muslims generally adjourn for the Maghrib prayer, the fourth of the five daily prayers, after which the main meal is served.

Social gatherings, many times in a buffet style, at iftar are frequent, and traditional dishes are often highlighted, including traditional desserts, especially those made only during Ramadan. Water is usually the beverage of choice, but juice and milk are also consumed. Soft drinks and caffeinated beverages are consumed to a lesser extent.

Making a small gesture of respect

This year the Ramadan begins on a day with long days and short nights. For example tomorrow, June, 29th Sunday, sunset is at 3:14 am and sundown not until 10:07 pm. That is a long day without eating or a drink. I myself am not familiar with fasting, never did feel the need to do so. But this year will be different. As I am not a follower of the Muslim religion - or any religion for that matter - I don't feel the need to fast a month. But as a symbolic gesture of solidarity I will fast on the Sundays of the Ramadan period. If people can fast for a month to feel what it is to be hungry, when you have plenty of food yourself, I can do that for a few Sundays.

It's just a simple gesture of respect for those that will have a difficult month ahead.

X = xoxo

Vanilla Post

INCYDK. XOXO means hugs and kisses. INCYDK is "In case you didn't know".
Everyone knows, of course, but I had to Google it. There are 9080 internet slang words and I don't know any of them. Several times I thought I had missed an unknown abbreviation, and found out later the sender made a typo so it made sense I couldn't find it! Did you know POS is Parents over Schoulder, or PRW: Parents are Watching? NIFOC: Naked in front of computer (Yum), TDTM: Talk Dirty to Me.
Did you know SM is Social Media? Or JO = Jerk Off?

It is a strange world to me. Fortunately I can find most on the Internet, so I don't look too ignorant!
Anyway I made one of my own: SKON (Small Kiss On the Nose).
NALOPKT (Not A Lot Of People Know This)!

My new keyboard

Friday, 27 June 2014

W = Woman

Naughty post

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,   
The stride of my step,   
The curl of my lips.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,   
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,   
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.   
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.   
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,   
And the flash of my teeth,   
The swing in my waist,   
And the joy in my feet.   
I’m a woman

Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered   
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,   
They say they still can’t see.   
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,   
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.   
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.   
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,   
The bend of my hair,   
the palm of my hand,   
The need for my care.   
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Maya Angelou

Thursday, 26 June 2014

V = Vanilla is a spice

Vanilla Post

A Rare Commodity

Vanilla is an expensive, rare commodity, and its depth of flavor ranks it right up there with the finest wines.It is described as 'creamy, spicy, woody, floral and fruity' when we taste vanilla. Vanilla is a spice.

Where Does Vanilla Come From?

Vanilla originated in Mexico with the Totonaco Indians, who were conquered by the Aztecs who, in turn, were conquered by Hernando Cortez. Along with other plunder, Cortez took cacao beans and vanilla pods back to Spain and the rest is history. Vanilla pods, commonly called vanilla beans, are the fruit of the vanilla orchid, the only orchid plant that produces an edible fruit. Today, the orchids are grown in Mexico, the Bourbon Islands, Tahiti, Indonesia, India, Uganda, and Papua New Guinea. They are hand pollinated, hand harvested and hand cured by farmers in a process that takes anywhere from 13 to 14 weeks. No wonder vanilla is so expensive!

Vanilla Pastry Cream Recipe

This recipe for vanlla pastry cream is the base for many decadent desserts.

Freeze leftover egg whites and save for leftover egg white recipes.
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 30 minutes
Total Time: 35 minutes

Yield: Enough for 13x9 Layer Cake

4 cups whole milk
1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise
1 tablespoon powdered gelatin
2 tablespoons cold water
12 large egg yolks
1 1/3 cups granulated sugar

Have ready a large bowl filled 3/4 full with ice and covered with ice water. In large saucepan over medium-high heat, bring milk and vanilla bean to a boil. Once it comes to a boil, turn off the heat and let vanilla steep in milk for 10 minutes. Remove vanilla bean.

In small bowl, gradually sprinkle gelatin over cold water and set aside to soften.
In medium bowl, whisk egg yolks with granulated sugar for about 1 minute to combine. Gradually pour in hot milk, whisking continuously.

Return mixture to saucepan and, stirring constantly with wooden spoon, cook over medium heat until sauce has thickened and is 180 degrees on an instant-read thermometer, being careful not to over cook or you will have scrambled eggs! Turn off heat.

Immediately stir softened gelatin into pastry cream until dissolved. Strain mixture through a fine-mesh sieve into medium bowl. Place bowl of pastry cream into bowl of ice water and stir frequently until it starts to cool and thicken. If not using immediately as part of a layered dessert, chill in refrigerator for at least 4 hours.

Vanilla is a spice

There is nothing boring about Vanilla

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Another dog post


Who are you, the happy dog or the angry one? Met an angry one  this week. Almost needed a tetanus shot. I like the happy dogs better I think. I know a few people that bitch all day. At anything and everything, The weather, politics, work, children, the in-laws and their spouse. It must be an unhappy life.

I try to be glad with everything I've got. When I'm at the supermarket and I look at my full shopping cart I am genuinely happy I can buy all that stuff. That sounds corny perhaps, but I'm sincere. To be able to eat whenever you want to. That something to be grateful for.

U = Ugol's Law

Naughty Post

Ugols law: For any given kink, either nobody does it or more than one person does it.
Urban Dictionary

When I was young I thought, probably like you  did, what is wrong with me? And slowly but surely I found out that I was not the only one with these thoughts, but there are in fact many people like me. 

Harry Ugol in the Usenet newsgroup made the statement which holds that if there's some kink you have or something turns you on, no matter how strange or bizarre it may be, you're not the only one who has that kink.  Ugol's Law. 

We know he is right. To vanilla people it is a crazy law like Murphy's. But to us it is very real. And to me it gives strength. And I hope that all of those people with hidden feelings find strength in the basic simple law of Harry Ugol. 

Because if there is something that turns you on, no matter how strange or bizarre, there is somewhere out there who feels exactly the same. Now you only have to find him or her.

Tuesday, 24 June 2014

If you are a sadist, become a dentist

Today I found out, well I got confirmed actually, that the real sadists in this world have only one ambition: to become a dentist. Well maybe they are all masochists as well, because how much fun can it be to look all day in people's mouths and smell bad breath all day? Only the guys that do rectal exams have a more lousy job, I think.

But when I am on the chair he takes revenge. Bruce Willis is a laddie compared to my dentist. My dentist loves root canals, he wants to discover each and everyone in my mouth. My dentist loves to take his time until my mouth get convulsions and one hour appointments are really a contribution to his next BMW. I think I paid the wheels.

I hate him. I love him also a bit. When were done.


T = Tie

Vanilla Post

If you can't knot your own tie, how can you tie someone else?

Think what a different post this could have been if it wasn't a Vanilla Post? I began to wear ties when I was 14,15 or so. (I was the only one at school :-) closed bracket after smiley. I know quite a few knots. Maybe it's that I like to tie knots so much, I like ties so much?

Aaaa hum

OK, OK, vanilla is a spice....

Harness bondage

Monday, 23 June 2014

She did it!

Proud Dad

My girl did it, she got her drivers' licence today! I am so proud of her, I could burst. What wonderful news today. It is a nice day, isn't it?

I'm not saying it was easy for her to do, but she did it. She needs certain adjustments like to open the throttle she doesn't put her foot down, but pushes her knee to the right.  That looks real weird! Anyway she can drive a car now. Next problem: to find an affordable car we can afford that she can move her wheelchair into! But that is for next week. Today we celebrate.

Be happy for me/her!!

S = Safe, Sane and Consensual

Naughty Post

Always first: what is it?

It sounds so familiar Safe, Sane and Consensual (SSC). It has been the BDSM-mantra for many years now. And people who knew what they were talking mentioned SSC, and some who didn't parroted it as well. But what is it? Safe? Sane? Consensual? Let's have a look what the The Eulenspiegel Society (the oldest and largest BDSM education and support group in the United States) has to say about it:

Safe, Sane, and Consensual

Safe: All parties have taken the necessary precautions to prevent psychological and physical damage to themselves, including the transmission of any disease.
Sane : All parties are in possession of their mental faculties and are aware of the risks involved in the intended play.
Consensual: All parties understand the potential risk involved and have consented to these activities. This consent can be withdrawn or modified at any time.

 OK, so what does it mean?

Safe: Free from harm. All necessary precautions that can be taken for a particular activity have been. I may have a clear image what safe is and what isn't. But is my safe the same as yours? Somehow I doubt that. What one person considers safe another may think is not only unsafe as it applies to them, but close to insane as well. Think of bullwhip, cuttings, needle play, electricity and brandings are just a few of the activities that some of us think are just playing, and many others find beyond their limits and thus unsafe for themselves. The word safe has played an important part in the public acceptance of BDSM in the last decades.

Sane: What is .... sane?  Sane means neither high, drunk or mentally unbalanced  in any way. Sounds good doesn't? So Sane is not so much applied to an activity, but rather to a state of mind. What you consider to be a sane activity I may think is completely crazy however. Sane is another comfort word in the BDSM-acceptance strategy. It separates the Dominants from the Ted Bundy's of this world. We are sensible people who like to spice our vanilla life with bondage and discipline.

Consensual: The most undisputed one in SSC. If the person you are playing with has not fully consented to whatever it is that is taking place, we call it rape and rape is rightly so punishable by law. Rapists do not enjoy prison all that much. Consent is the thing that devides us from rapists and abusers. Consent is something that is given before the play begins and not during the stress of the play. Consent is, again,  the most explicit of SSC.


Risk-Aware, Consensual Kink.  A term coined by Gary Switch as an alternative to Safe, Sane, and Consensual.  Mr. Switch argues that nothing's perfectly safe, negotiation cannot be valid without fore knowledge of the possible risks involved in the activity being negotiated, and the "sane" part of SSC is very subjective. He stated that RACK is a more honest way of describing the basic attitude of those involved in any BDSM-activity.

Risk Aware: Be aware what are some of the things that can go wrong, even with the best of planning and at the hands of the most experienced player. Think Murphy's Law. Risk is not the same as Safe. It just is an assessment of the dangers to might take place. What could go wrong, and if so what am I going to do if it does? In the vanilla world Risk is dangerous, even the word weighs less than Safe. Do you accept those risks? You weigh the enjoyment and the benefit and say: to me (Consensual Kink: to us)  this is Safe and Sane.

Rack seems a better approach to the responsibilities of both dominant as submissive people out there. But we need SSC for a while to make society understand that what we do in the bedroom is our own consensual private matter.

Just love the expression of submission

Sunday, 22 June 2014

R = Renée-Pélagie de Montreuil

Vanilla Post 

Life of Pélagie

Have you ever heard of Renée-Pélagie de Montreuil? (December 3, 1741 - July 7, 1810) She married at 21 Marquis D.A.F. de Sade, 22 at the time. She was of a wealthy family and the the Sade family was in a spot of financial trouble. So a marriage was arranged on May 17, 1763 to the Marquis de Sade by her unscrupulous parents. He already was a libertine and atheist. Yet, from the day they met, Renée Pélagie fell passionately in love with her husband and devoted herself totally to him. It's Sade's first and only marriage.
From her marriage to Donatien Alphonse Francois de Sade Pélagie had two sons and a daughter.

Though his marriage lasted 27 years, Sade spent 15 of them in jail or on the lam. Even when he was a free man, his taste for prostitutes and kinky sex kept him frequently on the road. Like everything else, Pélagie seems to have taken these absences in stride, just as she looked the other way while De Sade seduced her
10-year-younger sister Anne-Prospère de Launay, and became his mistress with her blessing.

On the eve of her husband's release from the Bastille, she obtains a formal separation and promptly drops out of his life. She returned to being the conventional creature she had been before she met Donatien de Sade and spent the rest of her life in religious devotion.

Life of Donatien

De Sade an easy target for the rebellious municipal courts in their war against the arbitrary juridical treatment meted out by the Crown. In 1768, already in detention in a royal jail on charges of whipping a woman until she bled, the Marquis was pursued with single-minded zeal by the Paris court, which publicly denounced his crime and issued a warrant for his arrest. 

The Marquis, however, was a repeat offender, and no amount of historical context can explain away his penchant for self-destruction. Typical of his escapades, Sade blithely engaged six adolescents to ''work'' at his estate, despite serious continuing legal trouble and heavy surveillance by the authorities. Six weeks later, the region was buzzing with news of wild orgies at the castle, and the parents of the young hires were suing the Marquis on charges of abduction and seduction. 

Marquise de Sade

The marriage

Through sex scandals, police raids and prison terms, Renee-Pelagie de Montreuil de Sade, the Marquis's plain and unschooled wife, remained a model of devotion. Though what was demanded of her -- particularly in the conjugal bed -- might not always have been to her liking, Pelagie never wavered. While her husband languished in the Bastille, Pelagie lived hand-to-mouth just to keep him in cutting-edge frippery and rich desserts. 

During a single month in 1784, according to prison logs, she had 12 packages of strawberries delivered to his cell. When she wasn't traipsing around Paris in doomed efforts to satisfy his wants, she was busy petitioning for his release, overseeing his real estate holdings and paying him marital visits (she bore him a child conceived in the Lyons jail). 

The single recorded exception in this exemplary servitude involved a request from the Marquis for custom dildos. Dutifully, Pelagie approached local cabinetmakers, only to have them laugh in her face when they learned the proposed objects' dimensions. ''I beg you to release me from this errand,'' she entreated her husband, apparently to no avail. But even this was humiliation in the name of a greater good: ''It was solely through Pelagie's love and dedication that the Marquis de Sade's talents were able to flower and become part of the Western heritage.'' In other words, without his wife's tireless ministrations, the irascible Marquis might never have written a word.

Saturday, 21 June 2014


OK, the streets in the Netherlands are all Orange these days. More than 7 million people here watch the Dutch team in the Soccer World Championships in Brazil. Shops close early to give the staff a chance the see the game. I'm not a big soccer fan myself, but if "our guys" play, well that's different, you know.
I had to post a soccer post, just because. You know. That's why.

The Dutch King and Queen in the dressing room:

Orange meets Orange

Q = Quattuordecim

Naughty Post

Quattuordecim is Latin for fourteen. And this game we are going to play next month is called Quattuordecim. (You know I don't like games much in general, but I have invented this one :-) closed bracket after smiley.

There are fourteen blank envelopes, all look exactly alike. Numbered from 1 until 14. Nothing else on the envelope. And in each envelope there is an assignment. That assignment is to be carried out within 14 days after the envelope was chosen. (The nice thing about this is, of course, the game can be halted for some time if real life demands immediate attention). But from the moment the envelope is chosen, the time starts to tick.

There is one "safe card" in one of the 14 envelopes. The safe card can be redeemed to avoid one assignment. The nice thing is of course she doesn't now if the safe card is in her first envelope or the last. 

The rest of the 13 assignments are different to keep the game interesting and from mild to very harsh to our standards. And everything in between. She doesn't know what the assignment will be, until she opens the envelope. She is a very curious woman so that is punishment in itself. 

The timing of doing the assignment is her choice. (And of course limited due to family life). But is has to be done within a fortnight. Quattuordecim. Punishment is already agreed on if she fails to fulfill the challenge in time. I am a sucker for a challenge. If we play the game without pause, it takes about a half year to finish, but I think we need a year or so. 

I am not going to tell you what the assignments are. Those are our - well ,OK.maybe more mine - fantasies. Yours will be different. But the idea is universal I think. I can spill the beans that in some of the challenges two dice are defining the number of spanks (min. 2, max 66).

I like the simplicity of the game the most. I finished all the envelopes today. 
Let the games begin.

Friday, 20 June 2014


This week Amazon was kind enough to send me a mail about a book “Unbeautiful” they suggested I should buy it from them. I didn’t, but couldn't get the word “Unbeautiful”  out of my mind. There are a lot of people out there who don’t consider themselves ‘beautiful’. 

Researchers have found that good looking students get higher grades from their teachers than students with an ordinary appearance. Some studies using mock criminal trials have shown that physically attractive "defendants" are less likely to be convicted—and if convicted are likely to receive lighter sentences—than less attractive ones. How much money a person earns may also be influenced by physical beauty. One study found that people low in physical attractiveness earn 5 to 10 percent less than ordinary looking people, who in turn earn 3 to 8 percent less than those who are considered good looking. In the market for loans, the least attractive people are less likely to get approvals, although they are less likely to default. In the marriage market, women's looks are at a premium, but men's looks do not matter much.

Is there something like being bereft of beauty? A lot of women think that they are. That is strange because it seems to me there are a lot more men that are plain, but women always seem to search for and find something unbeautiful about themselves. I know a woman who have had a stroke and the left side of her face is paralysed. Terrible blood clot in her brain hit her at 32 years of age. Now she can’t close her mouth anymore on the left side. It is not a pretty sight. She is deaf on one ear too, so she can’t hear everything people say, and sometimes that is for the best. She has to put drops in her eye to prevent it will be too dry.

And yet the other eye does compensate the whole of her appearance. She can look at you, no, she doesn’t look at you she looks right trough you. She has just about the most beautiful eye in the world. She is not unbeautiful at all. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”

P = Playing

Vanilla Post

Vanilla Post remember?

Thursday, 19 June 2014

Fair Tale

Once upon a time there lived a lovely princess with fair skin and blue eyes. She was so fierce that she was named Red Snow. Her mother died when Red Snow was a baby and her father married again. This queen was very pretty but she was also very cruel. The wicked stepmother wanted to be the most beautiful lady in the kingdom and she would often ask her magic mirror, “Mirror! Mirror on the wall! Who is the fairest of them all?” And the magic mirror would say, “You are, Your Majesty!” But one day, the mirror replied, “Red Snow is the fairest of them all!” The wicked queen was very angry and jealous of Red Snow. She ordered her huntsman to take Red Snow to the forest and kill her. “I want you to bring back her heart,” she ordered. But when the huntsman reached the forest with Red Snow, he took pity on her, spanked her bottom and set her free. He killed a deer and took its heart to the wicked queen and told her that he had killed Red Snow. Red Snow wandered in the forest all night, crying.

When it was daylight, she came to a tiny cottage and went inside. There was nobody there, but she found seven plates on the table and seven floggers in the bedroom. She cooked a wonderful meal and cleaned the house and tired, finally slept on one of the huge beds. At night, the seven Doms who lived in the cottage came home and found Red Snow sleeping. When she woke up and told them her story, the seven Doms asked her to stay with them. When the Doms were away, Red Snow would make delicious meals for them. The Doms loved her and fucked her. Every morning, when they left the house, they instructed her never to open the door to strangers.

Mirror, mirror on the wall...

Meanwhile, in the palace, the wicked queen asked, “Mirror! Mirror on the Wall is the fairest of them all?
The mirror replied, Red is the fairest of them all! She lives with the seven Doms in the woods!”

 The wicked stepmother was furious. She was actually a witch knew how to make magic potions. She now made a poisonous potion and dipped a shiny red apple into it. Then she disguised herself as an old peasant woman and went to the woods with the apple. She knocked on the cottage door and said “Pretty little child! Let me in! Look what I have for you!” Red said, “I am so sorry, old lady, I cannot let you in! The seven Doms have told me not to talk to strangers!” But then, Red Snow saw the shiny red apple, and opened the door. The wicked witch offered her the apple and when she took a bite poor Red Snow fell into a deep sleep. The wicked stepmother went back to the palace and asked the mirror, “Mirror! Mirror on the wall! Who is the fairest of them all?” The mirror replied, “You are, Your Majesty!” and she was very happy.

When the seven Doms came home to find Red Snow lying on the floor, they were very upset. They cried all night and then built a glass coffin for Red Snow. They kept the coffin in front of the cottage. One day, Prince Charming was going past the cottage and he saw Red Snow lying in the coffin. He said to the Doms, “My! My! She is so beautiful! I would like to kiss her!” And he did. Immediately, Red Snow opened her eyes. She was alive again! The Prince and the seven Doms were very happy. Prince Charming learned how to give Red Snow a good spanking and married Red Snow. He took her to his dungeon and lived happily ever after.

O = Orgasm Control

Naughty Post

Orgasm control is maybe one of the most powerful sexual controls that exist. For a very, very long time I thought it was just a fantasy in a book. To me the highest point of ecstasy could be reached by an involuntary movement, an arousing glimpse of something, the mere thought of a something sexy. Nothing that can be controlled, nothing that can be influenced.

A book actually made me realize the important thing about an orgasm is what happens in your mind and thus can be influenced. We tried. In books the guy has a radar of stopping just before the girl comes. And he does that over and over again. Well not in real life. Or this guy has no radar. I don't know. Not a success.

So the next thing we tried is old fashioned masturbation. First with a vibrator and a period of 10 minutes not being allowed to come. Not a success, I'm afraid. Next we tried with her fingers only. That worked better, much better. Our record now is three times ten minutes. The orgasm after that is so much more intense, she says and it is a motivation to play this game. The last thing I've added is for her to keep talking while masturbating. Anything she wants to say, dirty talk or not. (it often begins with very silly subjects but after she becomes aroused the talk is more dirty). She is not a person who likes to talk dirty so when she stops talking I give her a little spanking encouragement. I like it very much when she begs to cum because she can't hold it any longer.

It's something we need to explore more and better. But it is a thrilling extension to our play.

Nail placement

The hands

In popular depictions of the crucifixion of Jesus (possibly because in translations of John 20:25 the wounds are described as being "in his hands"), Jesus is shown with nails in his hands. But in Greek the word "χείρ", usually translated as "hand", referred to arm and hand together, and to denote the hand as distinct from the arm some other word was added, as "ἄκρην οὔτασε χεῖρα" (he wounded the end of the χείρ, i.e., he wounded her hand). A possibility that does not require tying is that the nails were inserted just above the wrist, between the two bones of the forearm (the radius and the ulna).

An experiment that was the subject of a documentary on the National Geographic Channel's Quest For Truth: The Crucifixion, showed that nailed feet provided enough support for the body, and that the hands could have been merely tied. Nailing the feet to the side of the cross relieves strain on the wrists by placing most of the weight on the lower body.

Another possibility, suggested by Frederick Zugibe, is that the nails may have been driven in at an angle, entering in the palm in the crease that delineates the bulky region at the base of the thumb, and exiting in the wrist, passing through the carpal tunnel.

The feet

In 1968, archaeologists discovered in northeast Jerusalem the remains of one Jehohanan, who had been crucified in the 1st century. The remains included a heel bone with a nail driven through it from the side. The tip of the nail was bent, perhaps because of striking a knot in the upright beam, which prevented it being extracted from the foot. A first inaccurate account of the length of the nail led some to believe that it had been driven through both heels, suggesting that the man had been placed in a sort of sidesaddle position, but the true length of the nail, 11.5 cm (4.53 inches), suggests instead that in this case of crucifixion the heels were nailed to opposite sides of the upright. The skeleton from Jerusalem is currently the only recovered example of ancient crucifixion in the archaeological record. (Wikipedia)

Crucifixion is a form of slow and painful execution

Monday, 16 June 2014

N = Nadu

Vanilla Post

Vanilla is a spice...

The Gorean World revisited

On the G= Gor post I already explained the impact of GOR books on the early BDSM community. The positions described in the books, about 15 positions I think, are still the basis of many couples positions today. One of the most basic ones is Nadu. (Norman stole this position from Yoga mediation I think).


Nadu is the word in the Gorean language for kneel. Nadu is one of the first things  an enslaved woman on Gor is taught. It is the general position of a slave when resting. The slave kneels before the Master or Mistress. The head is held high, but the eyes are downcast. The knees are spread widely, so that the inside of the knees is a space as wide as the shoulders. The shoulders themselves are back with the spine straight (kajirus a male slave) or slightly arched (kajira, a female slave). The breasts are thrust outward. The hands are placed on the thighs, open, with the palms upward. She shows her vulnerability, her subservience and her sexual needs. The hips rest on the feet, which are turned in so as to take the weight off the arches. If the slave will be getting up and down often, it is permitted change the position of the feet so that getting up and down can be done gracefully.

Instructions step by step

Nadu position
  1. Kneel with the thighs spread naturally
  2. Straighten your shoulders and bend your back slightly backwards
  3. Chest out, belly fall
  4. Keep the head high, proudly
  5. Lower the eyes in respect
  6. Place your hands on the thights, palms up.

Quotes from the Books

Position!," I snapped. Swiftly she knelt again, as she had been commanded earlier. You obey with the alacrity of a slave girl," I observed. If I do not," she said, "I could be punished as one, could I not?" "Yes," I said, "and would be." I walked about her, examining her, She kept her back very straight, and her head up. I was then again before her. I noted that the palm of her hands, so soft, so vulnerable, had turned on her thighs, so that they faced up. Among slave girls this is a common ways of signaling need, helplessness, a desire to please.
Vagabonds of
Ulrick had told me that certain kinds of slaves, house slaves, 'tower slaves,' and such, whatever they were, might kneel with their knees together, but I had also been informed that I, and the other girls, were not such slaves. For us, at any rate, for whatever sort of slave we were, the open-kneed position was commanded. Too, I felt that it was the one which was right for me, at least before men.
"Dancer of Gor" (page 85)

"Kneel, back on your heels," said the trainer to the dark-haired woman. "Straighten your back, suck in your gut, put your shoulders back, thrust out your breasts, spread your knees, widely, lift your chin, put your hands on your thighs. You are not going to be sold as a Tower Slave, Lady Tina. You are going to be sold as a Pleasure Slave."
"Kajira of Gor" (page 141)

She knelt in the position of the Pleasure Slave but her hands on her thighs had unconsciously, pleadingly, turned their palms to me, and she no longer knelt quite back on her heels. It was as though she begged to be allowed to lift and open her arms and rise and come to my arms. But as I looked upon her sternly she turned her palms again to her thighs, knelt back on her heels and dropped her head, holding her eyes as if by force of will fixed on the plastic beneath my sandals.
"Priest Kings of Gor" (pages 234-235)

In all these kneeling positions, incidentally, even that of the pleasure slave, the Gorean woman carries herself well; her back is straight and her chin is high. She tends to be vital and beautiful to look upon.
"Priest Kings of Gor" (page 46)

"He suddenly snapped his fingers and, in the swift double gesture of the Gorean Master, pointed to a place on the dirt floor before him, almost simultaneously turning his hand, spreading the first and index fingers, pointing downwards. I fled to him and knelt before him, my knees in the dirt, in the position of the pleasure slave, my head down, trembling."
"Captive of Gor" (page 143)

Seeing my eyes upon her she then knelt on the surface of the couch, kneeling back on her heels, spreading her knees, straightening her back, lifting her head, and putting her hands on her thighs. It is a common kneeling position for a female slave.
Savages of Gor...(pg.9-10)

Example by a slave

Slipping gracefully to her knees, her thighs spread painfully wide, causing her silks to rise and expose her glistening sex for the pleasure of the Masters. her back straight like an arrow, her long hair brushing against her ass, her breasts thrust forward and out, her hard nipples pressing against the silk, her head high and her eyes lowered respectfully, she smooths her silks and places her hands on her bare thighs palms up, showing her desire to serve and please.

Nadu, elegant version, look at the feet

Visit of the other wonderful posts of bloggers participating in the A-Z Blogging Challenge as well! Every day I try to visit six or seven blogs as well, so at the end of the challenge I have seen each blog at least twice. I started at the top and working my way down. (With all the changes, I lost track a bit about which ones I visited, but now the list is closed, I got it organized again. I hope) Those seven sites are today:

Katherine Deane
Jolynn Raymond's Dark Obsessions
All Things Spanking
PK Corey
Natasha Knight
Jaye Peaches
Joelle Casteel- author of bdsm erotica



Sunday, 15 June 2014

Father's day

Today I got the most wonderful present for father's day. Due to the cost of living I always ask for a drawing. But now she's 20, she doesn't want to make a drawing for her dad. Pity. I loved those.

Today I got a second hand book Johann Sebastian Bach by Christoph Wolff in Dutch.(608 pages, yum.). And what is so special about it the previous owner decorated it with his own pictures, newspaper clippings and - that is special - a ticket he has visited the Bachhaus in Eisenach, Germany. This guy loved Bach as much as I do, or even more.

I can't wait...

M = Military play

Naughty Post

I don't like role play very much. I mean, if I wanted to be an actor, I would have gone to Hollywood, made a fortune an kiss all the pretty girls in a movie. And so I am very, very silly when I try to be something I am not. Ever seen an introverted guy act? I don't want to tell you all the embarrassing details about the times we tried, and failed miserably. Well, I failed miserably really.This TMI that all of you would love to hear, because those are the juicy stories, I'm  keeping to myself.

The only role play that went just fine was Military play. I had this job where I had to wear a uniform. So wearing an uniform was familiar ground. It was me, you know not some joker trying to be someone he wasn't. My wife always loved the uniform. We have this one fancy uniform she really liked. Don't ask me why. It made me look strong and powerful :-) My wife is famous for her sense of humor. More sober, she felt very safe when I was wearing it, she said when I asked her about it.

So we played a prostitute being arrested and given the choice between solitary confinement or a good spanking. Or taken in for walking outside in indecent clothes (I liked that one). The "lines" came only naturally in this setting. Strange, huh? Nothing forced about these scenes.

Anyway do you like the guys in uniform like this one?

Visit of the other wonderful posts of bloggers participating in the A-Z Blogging Challenge as well! Every day I try to visit six or seven blogs as well, so at the end of the challenge I have seen each blog at least twice. I started at the top and working my way down. Those seven sites are today:

Trent Evans Letters
Incessantly Spanked
Maren Smith
Holla Dean
Maddie Taylor
Daizie Draper
Helen Karol Writes

Saturday, 14 June 2014

Love song

I know, I know. You have heard this song in the elevator. You have heard this song in the supermarket. You have heard this song in the bathroom of a hotel.

Still, close your eyes, I said close, and listen to the text. Just concentrate on the text. It is so beautiful.

Never was one for a one-night stand

L= Love needs two days 

"The Rose"
Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you its only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking

That never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give,
And the soul afraid of dyin'
That never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely

And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed that with the sun's love

In the spring becomes the rose.

Performer: Bette Midler
Writer(s): Amanda Mcbroom

Friday, 13 June 2014

L = Love

Vanilla Post

How Do I Love Thee’

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, — I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death. 

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Visit of the other wonderful posts of bloggers participating in the A-Z Blogging Challenge as well! Every day I try to visit six or seven blogs as well, so at the end of the challenge I have seen each blog at least twice. I started at the top and working my way down. Those seven sites are today:

Jaye Peaches
Joelle Casteel- author of bdsm erotica
Patricia Green Books
Sue Lyndon
Leigh Smith
David S. Holly
Bawdy Bloke

Thursday, 12 June 2014

Maya Angelou died

Maya Angelou is no longer with us. Her real name was Margueritte Johnson. She was born in Saint Louis, Missouri on April 4 april 1928 – and died peacefully in Winston-Salem on May, 28th 2014. This beautiful woman inside and out was a warrior for equality, tolerance and peace. A teacher, a poet, an activist. An artist. And a truly wonderful human being.

K = Kneeling

Naughty Post

Kneeling - To be used as a form of "respect" towards the Dominant. We use kneeling when something important has to be discussed, or if my loved one has naughty plans. 

There are many misconceptions about kneeling, People that are new to this, think a submissive spends a lot of the day on their knees. They don't actually, as far as I am concerned. It's a male writers fantasy I think, to have a naked woman waiting for you, on her knees waiting until the Lord of the Manor comes home. If you think that's true, think again. Kneeling is often for a short time and has a function. It's an act of lowering yourself literally to your dominant and by doing so you let him know that the balance of power has shifted to his side.

Now his side means also her side. I love love in all its forms and shapes and in all its structures. Male /male, female/female, male/female, Dominant male and submissive female or the other way around, three people in one relationship, I don't care as long as you love feel loved.


I think touching is important. 
I know I am an introverted person, but I am not shy I think. When I am talking to people I like to touch. I often don't realize touched someones hand or shoulder unless they make a gesture to retreat. My loved one is used to it now. In the evening I put her legs on my lap and caress them when I'm reading a book or just talking. It still excites me if she sits on the floor in front of me so I can touch her whenever I feel like it. I remember on my wedding day I was thinking "oh, now I can touch her all the time, she's mine. Stupid, huh? But it's the truth we always even in public feel the need to hold hands, or just touching.

Why did I tell all this about touching? Oh, yes I wanted to explain the difference between my wife sitting on the floor touching and come to me and kneel. Kneeling is: "pay attention dude, I have got something important so say".

Practice, practice, practice

Kneeling with elegance is an art form. Really my loved one has my attention already by the way she kneels. Anyone can learn elegance. It doesn't matter if you think you don't look like a model in a magazine. Women are so judicial about the way they look . There is no need to! If your husband would have wanted a model, he would have married one. (And maybe he even did ;-) close bracket after smiley. But he chose you for who you are. 

That doesn't mean you have to stop working on Elegance. There is proudness and determination and plain exercise in Elegance. Practice in front of a mirror if you can. Yes that may scare you to death, but do it anyway.

Kneel down rested on your calves. Rest your feet with the tops on the floor and then bending your toes under for support. Place your knees together and then spread them apart. Try different placements of your hands in this position. Practice resting your hands on your thighs, crossing them in front of your chest, or behind your back, or behind your head. How long can you hold each of these different positions? How can you make it look graceful, composed and sensual? Try to hold the following positions for 10 minutes and use the mirror to see improvements. Be proud of yourself. 


Please check my blog on June, 16th N = Nadu. I can't wait until it's Monday again!

Visit of the other wonderful posts of bloggers participating in the A-Z Blogging Challenge as well! Every day I try to visit six or seven blogs as well, so at the end of the challenge I have seen each blog at least twice. I started at the top and working my way down. Those seven sites are today:

Rayanna Jamison
Celeste Jones
Katherine Deane
Jolynn Raymond's Dark Obsessions
All Things Spanking
PK Corey
Natasha Knight

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